18459

something i'm learning about myself...

in three days i will be done with the after school part of my involvement with bird street.  it feels like it's been a long year but it's also gone by so fast.  and i think i'll miss it in a way.  or at least i will certainly miss some of the kids i've been able to get to know over the year.

on thursday we had our year end party and awards ceremony.  i wanted to do something fun that the kids would enjoy, but also something that would speak into their lives.  who knows how much impact a green certificate with some words on it can have in a kids life, but i really felt like this was something we needed to do.

they loved the awards ceremony even if they didn't completely "get" it.  for each of them i created a certificate for something they accomplished or contributed during the year (everything from excellence in math to best laugh).  but then i also tried to connect their accomplishment to something they want to do in the future (for example the student who won the leadership award wants to be a teacher, so i tried to help her see how those go together).

i think this is a big part of who i am.  i really enjoy the opportunities i get to cast some vision into people's lives and help them see what could be.  whether it is a kid in an urban school, a college student, someone in our community group, my wife...i want to be the kind of person who cultivates vision and passion and not someone who squashes it.

andy stanley writes in visioneering: "what would happen if you were to begin speaking to people's potential rather than their performance."  there is somewhat of a fine line here...some people would say that its wrong or irresponsible to tell a kid they can be whatever they want to be.  but i think i would rather error on the side of speaking to people's potential.  and with the kids in my program it feels even more important to be "irresponsible" because not many people in their lives will be.

i guess what i am trying to say is that other people can speak to performance...i'm learning that my role is to speak to potential.

 

18359

one of my favorite phrases used by the kids i work with is "been knowed."  as in "i been knowed that," as in "i already knew about that which you speak of before this present moment."  for some context, you might overhear the following conversation:

some second grader: "i'm smarter than you even though you in third grade."

some third grader: "no you ain't."

second grader: "aight...what's 6 times 6."

third grader: "i been knowed that since first grade...36!"

sometimes, for emphasis, you might even hear: "i been DONE knowed that," just to drive the point home.

as someone who grew up in the church, went to seminary, and has served a church community as a pastor there are a number of elements and practices that feel like "i been knowed."  one of those is sabbath.  i been knowed that sabbath is important, that we need rest, that God rests and invites us into that rest.  but, despite being a pretty relaxed person, i really stink at sabbathing.

a couple of months ago, at church, we talked about finding joy in the midst of exhaustion, a sermon that hit WAY close to home.  for most of the year amy and i have been extremely busy monday through friday, working over 50 hours a week at our respective jobs/schooling (plus community group and coffee meetings with people), then going over to Qunicy street on saturday mornings, cleaning the house on saturday afternoon, going out with friends/dates on saturday night, going to church on sunday morning which involves travel and means we aren't home until mid afternoon, which leaves just enough time to do the laundry and dishes and go to bed and start the whole thing all over again.  i just got exhausted rereading that sentence.  something had to be done.

so, we've made saturday our sabbath.  which has been hard because it means saying no to some really good things.  like being present in the quincy street neighborhood on saturday morning.  or not doing every social thing available to us on the weekends.  it gives the impression of being a flake or antisocial.

i think that's been harder on amy who has a longer history with quincy street than i do (and i get more than enough kid time during the week).  plus she's taking on an administrative role over there, meaning she's behind the scenes, which, as she can tell you, has pluses and minuses.  

difficulties aside, we've found this new practice of sabbath to be really good...life giving and life saving, to be perfectly honest.  i've recently been reading The Dangerous Act of Worship: Living God's Call to Justice which argues that a life of justice is the natural outpouring of our worship of God.  particularly affirming and convicting has been a chapter titled: "Doing Justice Starts with Rest."

two good quotes:

"justice is God's business.  God's people are important but are secondary players in this cause.  the gospel underlines that only God can establish peace and justice.  faithful worship shows that God is relentless in this and wants to use us in the effort.  but God calls us to live out of his rest, which teaches us in matters of injustice, as in all else, that we do not have the final authority or responsibility."

and 

"our engagement in works of justice arises out of a worshipful life.  it comes not out of being activists but out of living in God's rest, every day.  this is one of the most profound aspects of a Christian social ethic.  it is not that we are meant to find our lives by being community organizers.  it is that, as we live in the rest of God, we live in our true home, in the heart of God in Christ, in whom 'all things hold together.'"

all of that to say, i "been knowed" that sabbath is important, but i am finally experiencing that in a real, tangible, sacrificial, life giving way right now.

18259

amy and i have been married for 365 days...which equals 1 year!  we went to the blue hills, and it was awesome...check it out.

18159

amy and i are off to the blue hills this weekend to celebrate our one year anniversary...before we leave though, id like to share two cool bird street stories.

- i've written about aishah before and this year she has really struggled in our program (for a lot of good reasons).  over the year we've come to a good place as far as being able to exist together civilly for three hours every day.  she wrote me a thank you note yesterday (on thank you stationary).  here's what she said:

"Thank you Steve for teaching me and being there for me.  Even though you are annoying I still appreciate you.  Love, Aishah"  

wow!  that's huge

- we've also been doing a lot of surveys and it's been cool to get feedback from teachers and see how students have improved over the year.  it was also fun to do student surveys and see what they've thought about their year.  there was one free response question where they could write or draw about "what they learned this year."  a lot of them said stuff about hip hop dance, or art, or playing outside, fun stuff like that.  my favorite, though, was isiah who simply wrote: "i learned to be good."  another wow!  i asked him about and i think he really means it...cool!