19259 fun_raising

here's how coming on staff with sojourn works, in a nutshell: a person gets really excited about what sojourn does, feels the call of God on his or her life, does the pertinent research and conversation having, decides to go for it, makes the necessary arrangements, and then begins the arduous, and nerve wracking, process of raising sufficient funds.

I'm at the arduous and nerve wracking stage.

in july i got back my first round of receipts, which would have been for the month of june. not bad for the first month! we received well over a third of what our monthly budget would be. awesome, i thought, what a great start. then july came and went and we had a grand total of nothing. not awesome.

here's how the process has gone so far:

we did two fundraising events, one in Boston and one in Salinas. both went well, with the Salinas event being particularly special and affirming. then i spent the summer working on packets for churches. we ended up sending out nine packets, fully equipped with video and other visuals. so far, we've heard back positively from four of the nine, and the other five i am in the process of following up with. actually, i've been pleased with the response we've received from churches, as campus ministry has kind of a historical love-hate relationship with church. all, along i've felt like if three of the nine came on board financially we'd be well on our way.

now i am in the stage of writing letters and sending off packets to individuals. this is actually kind of fun (hence the "fun" raising title, not a typo)...i enjoy the time i get to put in to each one, and love being able to think about great moments i've shared with the person i'm writing, or some way that they have influenced me over the years. but it is slow. i've eschewed the mass form letter for person petitions. that feels better to me, especially since so many people i know are in California and i can't sit down and take them out to coffee and explain what we are doing.

i like this process in some ways and hate it in others...how do you ask for money without being annoying? how do you follow up with people with out being super annoying? is asking boldly a great act of faith and courage, or does that just put people off? is asking humbly a simple and nicer way to do it, or is that just being a chicken? and on and on the self-questioning goes.

the bottom line is this: i have never been more convinced in my entire life that what i am doing is exactly what i am supposed to be doing with my life. i also know, based on a long history of seeing God work, that our needs will be more than met. but despite all that i still struggle in the in-between place.

so there are some thoughts on the weird life of a fund-raiser.

be checking back tuesday for the beginning of a new approach to the illumination dilemma...i think you all will like it.

19159

- some pics and video from the end of camp. the pictures are from the overnight experience amy and i took the kids on. the video is of my two favorite campers...they are new to the US from Ethiopia (ten months ago). they are simply two of the brightest and most polite kids i've ever met. and they're not bad at step either =)

- overnight fun!

- stepping awesomeness! (my apologies for the poor quality)

19059

updates to last week's post:

1) one week of camp to go. this last week was especially crazy. two of my counselors (and two of my better staff as far as working with the kids goes) got into a crazy fight. the police were called, threats were made, charges were considered to be pressed. it was out of control. both were terminated which means we've been short staffed and will be through the end of camp. crazy, crazy, craziness. all that to say the sense of heaviness i've experienced this summer hasn't lessened this last week.

also, amy and i are feeling more and more compelled to consider adoption. not like next week or anything, but, you know, it's something we are talking about.

2) we have some dates now for closing on the house. october 9th is the magic day! we still do not have a solution for the intermediate, no house, time. we're getting mildly nervous, but not too much. at least not yet =)

3) we've had some preliminary meetings with the Boston University team and I am getting really excited about jumping in there in a few weeks! we've also finished all the church packets and are waiting to hear from a few and following up with some others. now it is time to move on to individuals. we are continually impressed with all the ways God is taking of us in this time.

that's it for now! peace.

18959

many, many things going on....so here we go:

1) in two weeks from today, camp will be over and i will no longer be employed by bird street community center.  what an interesting adventure this has been.  camp, this summer, has been challenging in so many ways and i have been incredibly stretched as a leader.  the most challenging thing has been what i am calling the "expansion of knowledge and care."  last summer i had 10-15 kids in my unit...i got to know them and their stories of brokenness and it was hard.  then this year in my after school program i had 25 kids, and i got to know them and their stories of brokenness and it was hard.  and now, this summer, we have had 100+ kids and 20 or so staff and i have gotten to know them and their stories of brokenness and it's REALLY hard.  

this last week has been especially difficult.  we have this little boy in camp who is six and has already been in four foster homes over the last year.  his mom is on drugs and in a lot of trouble.  he is a really sweet boy (most of the time) but is extremely angry and you can see the foster child story playing out already (even though he hasn't even been in the system a year).  i just found out on thursday that the couple he is with now (also really sweet people, but they are in their sixties and can't really handle his energy) are trying to move him.  this is just one of a hundred stories that rips me apart on a daily basis.  amy met him yesterday and wants to adopt him!

also, this week there was a double homicide that took place about half a mile from our home and right across the street from the community center (also, very near to the quincy street neighborhood).  there are a number of homicides that happen in the area, and i usually read about them, but feel somewhat disconnected even though they happen in our "neighborhood."  well, this time there was no disconnect. one of the victims was a really neat young guy who had life guarded at a pool i took the after school kids to every friday.  we were by no means close, but saw each other often, knew each other's first names, and i always appreciated the way he dealt with some of our rowdier students.  the incident happened early monday morning and affected a couple of people on my staff (as well as me and several people in our community group).  in some ways, this demonstrates that we are getting "deeper" into the community at large, but also it's been a tougher pill to swallow.

all that to say, it's been a heavy summer.

2) the process of buying a house has been extremely difficult and slow.  it's looking very much like it's going to happen, but man is it taking forever!  because of the slowness of this process we are going to be out of housing for about six weeks (yikes!) and are scrambling to figure that out.  for those of you who are praying types, this is a huge request!  this is another situation where i know in a year we will look back and have some good stories and laughs, but right now feels totally ridiculous.  

3) school (as in colleges and universities) is beginning soon, and i can't wait to tackle my first semester with Sojourn.  i am getting really excited about some partnerships with local stuff that we can get students plugged into.  some cool opportunities are starting to present themselves and this gets me fired up!  

the other side of that is the continual process of raising sufficient funds.  on the one hand this process has also been really slow (mostly due to my lack of time), and on the other it's already been amazing to see how people are responding and being even more generous than expected.  right now, my focus has been on churches.  i have created a little packet for ten churches to look at and review.  my hope and prayer is that three (i don't know where that number came from, but it feels like the right one) will financially support us, another three will be willing to send teams to help us out with our house and other projects, and that all of them will be praying for our ministry.

apologies for the long update.  i usually try to keep things shorter, but not this week!

peace

18859

can't decide if i have nothing to say or too much to say and not enough energy to write it all down.  so we have, instead, a list of things that i like right now...

1) nathan's picture a day blog: home sweet 22

2) books about suffering: one about the blues and one about creativity

3) websites about puppies

4) blogs about potential baseball trades

5) online giving

have a great week, hopefully i'll have more to say next time 

18759

nantasket beach!

18659

we have a lot going on right now.  summer camp is in full swing (a fairly all-consuming swing at that).  amy is in the midst of an intense 10 week clinical experience.  we are in the nitty-gritty stages of the home buying process.  plus we have family visiting, weddings to attend, more social gathering invitations than we have time for.  oh yeah, and i'm working on fundraising so that i can actually have one job and focus this fall.

i have to admit that in the middle of all that sojourn gets lost.  september, though right around the corner, still feels a long way off, especially with more pressing details and deadlines staring me in the face.  

which makes me all the more glad for the series we are going through at reunion right now.  it's called "roots" and it looks at the four generations described in genesis, starting with abraham.  which is cool, but even cooler, for me, has been the series of video stories they've done where different people in our community have shared about their own spiritual "roots".  we've heard three stories so far and for each one the pivotal moment arrived when they were in college.  

fascinating.  inspiring.  

these five minute stories are keeping me focused right now, reminding me that what i'll eventually be doing this fall is so vital and important to God's kingdom.

18559

i have a lot of books on my shelves about leadership.  some of them are inspirational, some are informative, some are analytical, some are anecdotal.  they are all intended to make the reader a "better" leader.  

i've read all of them.  i've taken classes on leadership.  i've been to the leadership summit.  i've been a leader in different contexts.  i've been a leader by title, by position, and by circumstance.

we are only four days in to summer camp and already this is the most challenging leadership experience i have ever had.  over the course of a given day i have had to get 10 five year old boys changed and ready for the pool, talk a seven year old girl into participating in activities with the rest of her group, motivate a sixteen year old junior counselor to "go above and beyond" by carrying one more cooler up the stairs, teach a unit leader how to be a leader to the kids and junior counselors they are overseeing, inspire the art teacher to think of something to do on a rainy day when she'd already seen all the kids once that day, speak frankly to a parent about their child's behavioral issues, and the list goes on and on (and almost all of this is cross-cultural as well).

so, i sit in my living room and look at all those books and chuckle to myself because they are fairly worthless when rain and thunder and lightening are bellowing forth from the sky and you have to get fifty kids off one broken bus and squish them on to a second bus with the same amount of kids, all while burning up your cell minutes trying to figure out where you are going to spend the day because hale reservation is no place to be in a storm like this one. 

and that was just the first week =)    

18459

something i'm learning about myself...

in three days i will be done with the after school part of my involvement with bird street.  it feels like it's been a long year but it's also gone by so fast.  and i think i'll miss it in a way.  or at least i will certainly miss some of the kids i've been able to get to know over the year.

on thursday we had our year end party and awards ceremony.  i wanted to do something fun that the kids would enjoy, but also something that would speak into their lives.  who knows how much impact a green certificate with some words on it can have in a kids life, but i really felt like this was something we needed to do.

they loved the awards ceremony even if they didn't completely "get" it.  for each of them i created a certificate for something they accomplished or contributed during the year (everything from excellence in math to best laugh).  but then i also tried to connect their accomplishment to something they want to do in the future (for example the student who won the leadership award wants to be a teacher, so i tried to help her see how those go together).

i think this is a big part of who i am.  i really enjoy the opportunities i get to cast some vision into people's lives and help them see what could be.  whether it is a kid in an urban school, a college student, someone in our community group, my wife...i want to be the kind of person who cultivates vision and passion and not someone who squashes it.

andy stanley writes in visioneering: "what would happen if you were to begin speaking to people's potential rather than their performance."  there is somewhat of a fine line here...some people would say that its wrong or irresponsible to tell a kid they can be whatever they want to be.  but i think i would rather error on the side of speaking to people's potential.  and with the kids in my program it feels even more important to be "irresponsible" because not many people in their lives will be.

i guess what i am trying to say is that other people can speak to performance...i'm learning that my role is to speak to potential.

 

18359

one of my favorite phrases used by the kids i work with is "been knowed."  as in "i been knowed that," as in "i already knew about that which you speak of before this present moment."  for some context, you might overhear the following conversation:

some second grader: "i'm smarter than you even though you in third grade."

some third grader: "no you ain't."

second grader: "aight...what's 6 times 6."

third grader: "i been knowed that since first grade...36!"

sometimes, for emphasis, you might even hear: "i been DONE knowed that," just to drive the point home.

as someone who grew up in the church, went to seminary, and has served a church community as a pastor there are a number of elements and practices that feel like "i been knowed."  one of those is sabbath.  i been knowed that sabbath is important, that we need rest, that God rests and invites us into that rest.  but, despite being a pretty relaxed person, i really stink at sabbathing.

a couple of months ago, at church, we talked about finding joy in the midst of exhaustion, a sermon that hit WAY close to home.  for most of the year amy and i have been extremely busy monday through friday, working over 50 hours a week at our respective jobs/schooling (plus community group and coffee meetings with people), then going over to Qunicy street on saturday mornings, cleaning the house on saturday afternoon, going out with friends/dates on saturday night, going to church on sunday morning which involves travel and means we aren't home until mid afternoon, which leaves just enough time to do the laundry and dishes and go to bed and start the whole thing all over again.  i just got exhausted rereading that sentence.  something had to be done.

so, we've made saturday our sabbath.  which has been hard because it means saying no to some really good things.  like being present in the quincy street neighborhood on saturday morning.  or not doing every social thing available to us on the weekends.  it gives the impression of being a flake or antisocial.

i think that's been harder on amy who has a longer history with quincy street than i do (and i get more than enough kid time during the week).  plus she's taking on an administrative role over there, meaning she's behind the scenes, which, as she can tell you, has pluses and minuses.  

difficulties aside, we've found this new practice of sabbath to be really good...life giving and life saving, to be perfectly honest.  i've recently been reading The Dangerous Act of Worship: Living God's Call to Justice which argues that a life of justice is the natural outpouring of our worship of God.  particularly affirming and convicting has been a chapter titled: "Doing Justice Starts with Rest."

two good quotes:

"justice is God's business.  God's people are important but are secondary players in this cause.  the gospel underlines that only God can establish peace and justice.  faithful worship shows that God is relentless in this and wants to use us in the effort.  but God calls us to live out of his rest, which teaches us in matters of injustice, as in all else, that we do not have the final authority or responsibility."

and 

"our engagement in works of justice arises out of a worshipful life.  it comes not out of being activists but out of living in God's rest, every day.  this is one of the most profound aspects of a Christian social ethic.  it is not that we are meant to find our lives by being community organizers.  it is that, as we live in the rest of God, we live in our true home, in the heart of God in Christ, in whom 'all things hold together.'"

all of that to say, i "been knowed" that sabbath is important, but i am finally experiencing that in a real, tangible, sacrificial, life giving way right now.

18259

amy and i have been married for 365 days...which equals 1 year!  we went to the blue hills, and it was awesome...check it out.

18159

amy and i are off to the blue hills this weekend to celebrate our one year anniversary...before we leave though, id like to share two cool bird street stories.

- i've written about aishah before and this year she has really struggled in our program (for a lot of good reasons).  over the year we've come to a good place as far as being able to exist together civilly for three hours every day.  she wrote me a thank you note yesterday (on thank you stationary).  here's what she said:

"Thank you Steve for teaching me and being there for me.  Even though you are annoying I still appreciate you.  Love, Aishah"  

wow!  that's huge

- we've also been doing a lot of surveys and it's been cool to get feedback from teachers and see how students have improved over the year.  it was also fun to do student surveys and see what they've thought about their year.  there was one free response question where they could write or draw about "what they learned this year."  a lot of them said stuff about hip hop dance, or art, or playing outside, fun stuff like that.  my favorite, though, was isiah who simply wrote: "i learned to be good."  another wow!  i asked him about and i think he really means it...cool!

18059

updates...

- last weekend amy and i flew to california to share with some of our favorite people about what we are doing with sojourn.  it was a truly awesome time!  we feel so blessed and incredibly encouraged.  so far, in fact, the whole fund raising experience has been overwhelmingly positive.  we still have a lot of work to do and much money to raise yet, but i'm actually enjoying it and consistently in wonder at the partnerships that are developing.  i'm learning that the best thing about raising your own support is that you discover how creative God is in taking care of your needs, and that is pretty cool.

- thank you so much to those who continue to pray about our housing search.  we feel like we are zeroing in on a pretty incredible opportunity.  there are many details still to work out (so keep praying!) but again, we are constantly surprised by how the pieces of this puzzle are falling in to place.

- i have 16 more days of work as a site coordinator, then camp starts.  i'm really looking forward to the change that camp represents (never thought i'd say that after last summer).

- finally, we just feel really grateful for all the wonderful people in our lives...so thanks!!! 

17959

it's been exactly a year since i left durango...i've been reflecting on this for the last couple of days.  it's been quite a year.  it's been a strange year...let me explain.

on the one hand this has been the best year of my life.  the transition from being single to being married has been relatively simple.  i love being married to amy!  i've also been able to make a few friends and establish some good relationships here in boston.  we love our church and it's been pretty easy to integrate into the life of reunion.  our community group has surpassed all expectations i had going in...what an amazing experience that has been!  i've been able to work and earn enough income to provide for our needs...we have great health insurance, and haven't had to worry too much about money.  God has provided for us in so many ways beyond jobs...we received some inheritance money, i sold my car (actually mom sold my car =), we got a lot back in taxes, and there just seems to be a myriad of big and little ways we've been taken care of beyond our own efforts.  we're even in a position where we are able to at least consider purchasing property.  beyond all that, it's just fun living in a city, exploring boston, and enjoying opportunities to see the red sox and good concerts.  finally, as i posted a few weeks ago, there has been lots of growth this year in my own life, "how to be a man 101" stuff that has been really good.

on the other hand, this has been a really difficult year for me, especially vocationally.  starbucks has taken a pound of my flesh (literally, as i have been dealing with some skin issues on my hands), and bird street has taken a pound of my soul.  i've been working at least 50 hours a week for almost eight months now.  i wake up at 4:45 am at least three days a week and i feel exhausted most of the time.  now, i've added fundraising and preparation for time with sojourn on top of the rest of the craziness.  

someone (i think it was sarah beth) asked me how i thought transitioning back into ministry would be a good way to "slow down" and simplify my schedule and life.  and it may not be.  but i remember a conversation i had once with my brother in law, john, who worked construction during his first year of marriage.  that experience led him to believe that he'd rather "break his back building the kingdom of God than building houses."  i feel the same way.

in so many ways, this has been a crazy year, and we may be stepping into a whole new level of craziness and uncertainty.  but i think if i'm going to give up my life for something, it's not going to be for coffee and after school programs. 

17859

- sarah posted a video in honor of mother's day, which i thought was a great idea, so here's my mother's day video tribute...love you mom!

17759

- tuesday night was my first fundraising event as i prepare to come on staff with sojourn college ministry.  the night went really well...it was cool to see how deep we (amy and i have) gone already, in just 10 months of craziness, with some of our friends here.  i think that was the thing i was most impressed with...how much we really appreciate the people we got to hang out with. 

- the highlight for me was definitely being introduced by my friend caleb.  i've lucky enough to be honored a couple of times in my life, but i don't know that it has ever been done so well.  aside from being really encouraging caleb included references to high fidelity, dio, and and john cusack.  amazing!

- enojy the pics

17659

it's been a while...my apologies.  the season is changing rapidly here in boston...winter is long gone and it's feeling a lot like summer will soon be upon us.  which reminds me of what our house felt like when we first moved in...and the warmth makes me think of camp...and i realize it's almost been a year now since i left durango, got married, and made the move to the east coast.  so while we've been going at a breakneck pace for a while there has been some time for reflection in recent days...

...as i make yet another transition (back into full time ministry) i can't help but think about what an incredible year of learning this has been...learning how to be married, how to work in a difficult environment, how to speak up for yourself at work, how to buy a house, how to live in community, how to make new friends, how to budget for two, how to survive in the city, how to love, how to work with kids, how to live on less than 6 hours of sleep a night, how to balance two jobs, how to go to a church you didn't start, how to raise support, how to make decisions as a couple...

...the list could go on and on.  i don't pretend to have learned how to do any of those things well...but i do know that this year has been an education like no other.  i like to call it "how to be a man" and it's the best class i've ever taken!

17559 opening_day_fenway

we finally made it to opening day...26 hours after it was supposed to happen!  it was a great game (recap)...mvp pedroia followed up his big year with a home run in his first at bat...josh beckett (who is also on my fantasy team) struck out 10.  it was freezing but it was so much fun!!! (also, the giants won today...so not a bad way to get the season started)

17459

throughout the year most of my students in the after school program have been working with a science/environmental awareness group called "e" inc science.  they've been learning about the rain forest, primates and other animals that live in the rain forest, and have been creating action plans to lessen the human impact on rain forests (like using less paper, using both sides of a sheet of paper, creating recycling boxes for classrooms, etc).  

some of their work is currently being shown off in the Prudential Building Mall (downtown).  this friday we got to take them there, to show off their work and to get honored for their creativity and the projects they have undertaken this school year.  

it was awesome to see them honored so well, and to see them receive their honors.  it was the best behaved hour of the year =)  i was very proud of them...it was one of those rare moments where you can see some of the work you've done actually paying off.

here are some photos:

17359

i've mentioned a couple of times how cool our community group experience has been here in boston with reunion.  so, i thought i'd introduce (with permission) three of our new/good friends.

jenna...grew up outside of buffalo, ny.  she went to college in ny as well, at a small christian college.  she moved to boston this summer, after graduating, to join the AmeriCorps program City Year.  it has been a difficult year of transition for her as she has had to deal with some intensely personal issues surrounding her identity.  it would have been super easy for her to check out of everything, but she has stayed very much engaged in our community group.  she calls our group "the highlight of her week," and has grown fascinated with the concept of community.  her struggles this year have taken her away from City Year, but she has recently made the decision to stay in boston for another year and serve in some capacity that helps her more fully understand the vision for community that she is developing.

caleb...is a local from the Dot (shorthand for dorchester).  he grew up in the church but essentially gave up on christianity after high school when he joined the navy.  after doing his four years he has returned to dorchester and is attending Umass-Boston (which is five minutes away from our house).  since coming back to boston he has reengaged Jesus and the church.  it's been fantastic to watch him grow so much in the past four or five months.  he loves scripture and genuinely cares for the other people in our group.  he has also agreed to be my apprentice (kind of a small group leading in training sort of thing), which i am stoked about!

kaitlin...another sort-of-local (quincy, one town over) just graduated from the University of Delaware and moved home.  she is from a self-professing atheist family.  the first sunday she visited reunion she white-lied and told her parents she was "going out" because she was too afraid to tell them she was going to church =).  needless to say, the concepts of following Jesus, church, community groups, and reading scripture is all new to her and she shares some of the freshest perspectives and best questions with us every week.  she also has struggled with the "post-college" transition and seems to take real joy in having a group of friends, even weird, community group friends!  

we'd love it if you would continue praying for our community group and the life change that is happening there.  i know jenna, caleb, and kaitlin would appreciate it!

peace 

17259

many links...

thanks to everyone who responded to last week's post.  one of my jobs this week is to get the first prayer update out to people.  if you didn't get a chance to read it, scroll down or click here

sarah's baby came...many update and pics will likely be found here soon

we had a party for our very cool community group.  check out this video to see/learn more.

and check out the generous boston website (though our church: reunion), most excellent!

also, kaitlin, from our community group, who is new to following jesus has a video on the page as well.  check it out here!

finally, amy has a new post and it is amazing...read it here

17159 big_decisions_&_new_life_directions

i've been teasing out big family news for a while now. sorry for the delay.  i also realize that sarah is going to have a baby at any moment, news which may trump this post (for good reason).  nonetheless, now is the time to fill everyone in on our plans.

big decision #1

we have decided to stay in boston for the foreseeable future.  at one point we thought/planned on leaving when amy was done with school, but we feel like the city is really becoming home and we want to stay.  so stay we will!

big decision #2

and this is the main thrust of this post: we have decided to go on staff with sojourn collegiate ministry (well, steve is going on staff, officially, but amy is pretty into it too).  many details, regarding what this will look like and what we'll be doing, are still falling into place.  however, i thought i'd share something i wrote for our fundraising materials to provide a bit of insight in to our vision for this opportunity:

"We feel that living in the unique urban environment of Boston provides us with an amazing opportunity to use our gifts to serve the Kingdom of God. On the one hand, Boston boasts many of the finest institutions of higher education and some of the richest history our country has to offer. On the other, Boston also struggles with some of our nations darker historical realities, such as class and racial inequality, and failing public schools, which leave many of its own sons and daughters without access to its colleges and universities. Boston is the least and the greatest, the haves and the have-nots, often times separated by nothing more than a train track or a freeway.

Is there a way to bridge these worlds that so often feel too far apart? We believe that there is. This is why we choose to intentionally live in the forgotten neighborhoods of Boston. It is why we serve students at Boston University and the other schools around the city. We hope to be living examples of an integrated, kingdom lifestyle and to inspire students to experiment with and aspire to similar life commitments."

i hope that vision resonates with you at some level and that you will commit to praying for me and amy and the sojourn team as we work together to make this happen.  i'll be sending out emails to people i hope will partner with us in prayer, but if you already know you want in leave a comment, or send me an email (rmps59@yahoo.com) or facebook message, and you will begin to receive handy updates on a regular basis.  

also, questions are more than welcome!  thank you everyone, especially those of who have been reading and praying with me here for a long time...you are much appreciated.

(ps - 3909 - check out this article for an idea of the needs in the part of the country)

17059

at some point early in my sophomore year of college someone gave me a cd (probably kevin) by this band called jimmy eat world.  i had never heard of them at the time.  the album was called clarity.  it quickly became one of my favorites and served as a soundtrack for some of the momentous occasions of my life over the next couple of years.  clarity both defined the "emo" sound of the late nineties/early 2000's and was, in my opinion, a cut above other efforts by bands such as the get up kids, juliana theory, and the promise ring. 

that was in 1999.

it's now 2009 and the band decided to do a 10 city/10 show tour where they honored the 10 year anniversary of the album by playing the whole thing live.  great idea, right?  right!

except it's made me feel old.  a ten year anniversary tour for a band and an album that i fell in love with in college!!! yikes.

the worst part was that there were modern day college students at the show.  which means most of them were, oh, ten or eleven at the time the album came out.  sheesh.

so, all that to say, it's been a week of contemplation and reflection on the last ten years.  i'd like to think i've come a long way from all the angst over girls, what i'm going to do with my life, who am i going to be, etc, that defined me in 1999.  i think i might actually be growing up a little bit.

16959

this morning, before church, the quincy street crew (and a few random others) had the opportunity to hang out with shane claiborne and chris haw (they wrote this book, among other things, if you are not familiar with them).  if you know me, or have been a reader of this blog, you know i'm a bit of a fan of shane's lifework and thinking, which made the morning a somewhat momentous occasion.  and, in fact, it turned out to be a wonderful, encouraging couple of hours of eating breakfast and discussing kingdom things.

there were several special moments and awesome stories (for example, some of the kids in shane's neighborhood are getting close to college, so he went to Eastern, the school he attended, and asked them for scholarships for these kids...and Eastern granted them, which is incredible!).  but, the most encouraging words, at least for me and amy, came from chris haw.  

for years, i have heard (and seen), mostly from my parents, about the redemptive power of families and households (see Acts 11:14, 16:15, 16:31, 18:8, etc).  and i believe that what is often described as the "nuclear family" can have a tremendous kingdom impact, even in places like dorchester and, more specifically, quincy street.  

my former-idealistic-single-self thought that "of course married people can be a part of intentional communities and kingdom life in the inner city."  however, it's not that simple.  we've had a roommate since we moved to boston and part of that decision was purely economic survival in the city, but the other part of it truly was an experiment to see what it would be like to be married and live with other people.  and, it turns, this has been the biggest challenge of our young marriage.

chris had some good things to say about this.  he affirmed for us that having our own "space" was not selling out, or somehow a lesser form of community.  he also pointed out some ways that married people can be part of the rhythm of an intentional community, and that married people and families are absolutely necessary pieces of a qunicy street type endeavor.  amy and i walked away from that feeling relieved, encouraged, and inspired.  which is pretty awesome and totally worth getting up early on sunday morning!

16859 happy_valentine's_day

there are infinite ways that we can show love.  for some reason, our culture has chosen february 14th as an arbitrary date for celebrating love.  we also have chosen the color red, hallmark cards, boxes of candy, flowers, and teddy bears as the ultimate symbols for demonstrating our love.

there's nothing wrong with any of this, mind you (except, perhaps, for the ungodly amount of money spent on those items).  but this is not an anti-valentine's day post, just an alternative valentine's day story.

in fact, amy and i had a plan in place for our first valentine's day as a married couple (and the first where we've both been in the same geographic location).  we were going to go out for a night on the town: dinner, a brett dennen concert, etc.  we were both looking forward to it quite a bit.

on tuesday morning i woke up and immediately knew i was coming down with something.  turns out it was the worst flu i've had in a long, long time.  i seriously haven't been this sick in years.  i get migraines which are the worst, and i can get bad coughs at times which are also no fun, but this illness might take the cake.  it involved vomiting, head aches, body aches, chills, cold sweats, a fever, and tremendous amount of "not-right-looking" mucus in my head.  it was really bad.  i missed all work and community group on wednesday...went to bird street on thursday, and starbucks and bird on friday (probably not a good idea).  by the time i rolled up to our home on friday night, after working 10+ hours and feeling awful, i just wanted to pass out on the couch and not do anything until monday.

however, i found amy throwing up in the bathroom.  to make an already long and gruesome story shorter (and less gruesome) it turns out amy did not get my flu but has a hardcore ear infection.  (the doctor looked into her ear and immediately exclaimed: "wow, that's a bad one").  

our valentine's day has not been filled with teddy bears and little red heart shaped candies, but instead has had enough mucus and vomit and infections and drugs to last the rest of the year (not exactly hallmark card material).

when you get married you exchange vows, one of which is to love each other "in sickness and in health."  so somehow, i feel like our valentine's day experience is more grounded in reality than the card version.  and i kind of like that.  and in a weird way i have no doubt this is making us fall more in love with each other...and that is worth way more than a box of chocolates.    

16759

today sammy came downstairs around five o'clock, full of energy and excitement.  he held a ruler in his hands, tauntingly waving it about as he entered the room.  sam and aishah began to playfully engage each other, aishah trying to steal the ruler from sam's hands.

at some point, though, the ruler struck aishah on the arm which upset her deeply, more deeply than the moment warranted, in my opinion. 

"DON'T hit me," she said with firmness and conviction.

"He didn't mean it," said isiah, sam's brother.

isiah and aishah then exchanged words, words which became increasingly heated.  finally, aishah had enough.

"Shut up you faggot," she screamed.

obviously, the situation was now out of hand.  i took aishah aside, and sent isiah in the opposite directions.  they both sat and chilled while i took care of some other business.

"aishah," i said.  "what are we going to do?"

she proceeded to tell me that she "DOESN'T like to be hit."  hmmm...

we talked a while longer and, on her own, she came to the conclusion that she needed to apologize.  

at this point sam, isiah, and aishah were the only students left.  i sat the three of them down and said: "boys, aishah has something she would like to say."

aishah said: "isiah, i'm sorry i got so mad and called you a name...sometimes i get really angry and say things i don't really mean."

isiah said: "that's ok aishah...i'm sorry i got into your business."

sam said: "i want to apologize too...aishah, i'm sorry i hit you with my ruler."

the conversation continued...they talked it out, all on their own, with no help from me.  then they went and got a game and played together until their parent's picked them up.

and there you have another bird street tale of ugliness and beauty...forgiveness and redemption, third and fourth grade style.

16659

- more bird street stuff (see the previous post for a funny video)...

- we said goodbye to one our staff yesterday (shae is moving to a different site)...so this is what our groups have looked like over the last couple of months (sans a few kids)...

shae's group:

tiffany's group:

my group:

16559 king_of_the_bumblebee

- friday chess randomness

16459

too many thoughts for one post...i apologize.

- at some point in the next week or two i will have a major update regarding life direction to write about in this space...stay tuned.

- our community group continues to grow.  we are over double digits now!  (time to think about splitting, yikes).

- also, in our group we have some really fun new-christian/pre-christian types who bring a bunch of great energy and fresh perspectives to the table (one of our girls lied to her athiest parents about going to reunion at first...i love that!).

- i am having some really great conversations with ramon at starbucks.  our conversations have moved from film and making films to topics like religion and destiny and does anyone have the right to speak into other people's lives.  really interesting and fun.  we'll see what comes of that.

- bird street continues to be challenging in many ways, but i've experienced a recent break through with at least one of my students.  aishah's family is going through a nasty divorce right now and a lot of her anger over that got taken out on us.  she hated our program at first and did whatever she could to get written up/kicked out so she could go home, but now she has a turned a corner and is really enjoying herself after school.  which helps me enjoy myself too =)

- tuesday was also a big day at the school i work out.  it was very cool to see the kids get so excited about a national event.

- i am very antsy for baseball season to get underway.

- amy and i had our first experience of Boston University hockey (they are ranked 2nd in the nation in division I).  very fun!  they play in a beautiful arena, and hockey is such a great sport to see live.  however, we both felt very old sitting in the student section, wishing the dang kids in front of us would sit down and shut up.  

there's probably a bunch more to share, but i'll wrap it up there for now.

peace!

16359

- i love what manny has to say about today.  enjoy!

16259

i had an opportunity to share in church today about my experience as a "former pastor" joining a new church.  i enjoyed the opportunity and it gave me a moment to reflect on this transition as it has unfolded over the last seven months.

this has been a very unusual stage of life, but not anywhere as difficult as i had anticipated.  i think the main reason for this is that i love being married.  i was asked this morning to describe an "aha" moment as it pertains to leading community groups and my experience transitioning from staff to non-staff.  i think the biggest "aha" for me has been just how fun it is to lead with amy, as a team.  it is really, really amazing!

as much fun as i had in durango with ctk and as much as i miss it at times, i wouldn't trade anything for the opportunity to lead our funky little group of christ-followers in fields corner with my wonderful wife.  

so thank you john and tim and reunion for giving me the opportunity to reflect on that today.

(ps...if you want to listen, go here and download the podcast...i'm about 30 min in)

16159

- last night amy and i had the opportunity to watch "project: revelation," the short film i was in.  (see 15559 or this link).  i enjoyed the film and thought zack and ramon did a good job with this project.  however, it is tough to watch yourself act!  kind of weird actually.  more importantly, i think it was really fun to hang out with people who aren't a part of our reunion/sojourn circle.  their next project is called "success?" and i may help out in some role.  even if i don't though, this newest project has already sparked some interesting conversations about what it means to be successful.  i love those kinds of conversations and i am so pleased that my starbucks experience is starting to build some connections, relationships, and purpose beyond just some additional income.

- a couple of months ago i asked for some prayer regarding decision making and the future.  over the next weeks i'll be using this space to detail what that looks like for us.  so, stay tuned!